Shakespeare STILL not a minor English poet

A READER WRITES: “I see you still insist on describing Shakespeare as a minor English poet. I can assure you that you are amusing no one but yourself with this nonsense. If you continue with this abomination, you will lose me as a reader. Yours etc.”

Do YOU have a problem? Leave an anonymous comment, or send your problem in confidence to brianbarrington@gmail.com

Paris Hilton Reads This Blog!

Paris Hilton is possibly the world’s most famous celebrity. I caught up with her in her L.A. mansion where we discussed fame, relationships, Ambrose Bierce and her deep love of this blog.

BRIAN: Hi Paris. You’re incredibly well-known. Why do you think people find you so fascinating?
PARIS HILTON: Beats the hell out of me! I’m as mystified by the circus as anyone.
BRIAN: [laughs] So just how famous are you?
PARIS HILTON: Really, really famous. For years, my name has been one of the most common entries into Internet search engines. If you talk about me on your web page, you are guaranteed more hits. The more you mention the name of Paris Hilton on your web page, the more referrals you will get from search engines.
BRIAN: Really? So if I type your name into my blog over and over again like this: Paris Hilton Paris Hilton Paris Hilton Paris Hilton Paris Hilton Paris Hilton Paris Hilton Paris Hilton Paris Hilton – it will increase my readership?
PARIS HILTON: Guaranteed! But I’m sure you would never resort to such underhand tactics merely to try and get more hits …
BRIAN: [nervous laughter] No, no, of course not. So are you seeing anyone at the moment?
PARIS HILTON: Oh you know yourself Brian, I have a few things on the go. Nothing too serious.
BRIAN: Have you read any good books recently?
PARIS HILTON: Yes. I’ve been reading a the Devil’s Dictionary by Ambrose Bierce.
BRIAN: Wow! That sounds a bit … well … high-brow for someone like you. Are you trying to counter your image as a air-head blonde?
PARIS HILTON: God no! I make a good living carefully cultivating my image as an air-head blonde. It would be madness to try and get rid of that.
BRIAN: I see. Does it ever bother you that people think that you’re dumb?
PARIS HILTON: If people think I am so dumb, then why are they so interested in every aspect of my life? I ask you Brian, who are the really dumb people here? [gives me big wink].
BRIAN: [laughs] So what do you make of Bierce?
PARIS HILTON: In the pantheon of great American writers, I place him behind only Twain and Emerson. Consider the following definitions from his dictionary:

• Abstainer, n: a weak man who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.

• Absurdity, n: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.

• Admiration, n: Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.

• Egotist, n: A person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me.

• Amnesty, n. The state's magnanimity to those offenders whom it would be too expensive to punish.

• Happiness, n: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another.

• Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum - I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.

• Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.

• Famous, adj: Conspicuously miserable

• Friendless, adj: Having no favors to bestow. Destitute of fortune. Addicted to utterance of truth and common sense

• Future, n:That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.

• Impartial - unable to perceive any promise of personal advantage from espousing either side of a controversy.

• Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.

• Patience, n - a minor form of despair disguised as a virtue.

BRIAN: Wow! As a amateur philosopher, I have to admire Bierce’s wit and insight.
PARIS HILTON: Yes. Well I really admire your blog too. I read it every day.
BRIAN: [looking chuffed] Oh it’s just a little hobby of mine. Nothing too serious.
PARIS HILTON: No, no. I find your blog keeps me grounded. There’s something in it for everybody. It works on so many levels.
BRIAN: [blushing] Gee … Thanks Paris.
PARIS HILTON: I have to go now. Some of my female celebrity friends are in the hot-tub around the back of the house. Would you like to join us for a while?
BRIAN: It's a non-starter - I'm married.
PARIS HILTON: Oh come on!
BRIAN: [shuffling uneasily] Erm … perhaps I should just go. I’ve been reading one of Plato’s later dialogues, a really complex one, and I feel I should be getting back to it.
PARIS HILTON: Ok so, those Platonic Dialogues aren’t going to read themselves! Maybe you could join us for just a minute? Some of my friends need sun-lotion rubbed into them. You could do it.
BRIAN: [hesitates for a second before the words of a minor English poet come rushing into his mind –

"Poor soul, the centre of my sinful earth,
Rebuke these rebel powers that thee array;
Why dost thou pine within and suffer dearth,
Painting thy outward walls so costly gay?
Why so large cost, having so short a lease,
Dost thou upon thy fading mansion spend?
Shall worms, inheritors of this excess,
Eat up thy charge? is this thy body's end?
Then soul, live thou upon thy servant's loss,
And let that pine to aggravate thy store;
Buy terms divine in selling hours of dross;
Within be fed, without be rich no more:
So shalt thou feed on Death, that feeds on men,
And Death once dead, there's no more dying then".

Sorry Paris but I really have to go.

PARIS HILTON: Ok so. All the best
[Interview Ends]

The Wonders of Google Analytics

You really find some interesting things when you examine Google Analytics.

Apparently, some people who type “Sex with dog” into Google end up at this website, but they only stick around for an average of 39 seconds, so the site does not seem to be quite what they were looking for.

A lot of people who type in “Nobody reads my blog” into Google also end up on this website. Clearly, this is a serious problem for a lot of people.

The average time that readers in France spend on the site is higher than that of readers in any other country. The intellectuals over in France appreciate the weighty philosophical insights that the site offers. Readers in South Korea and Kenya also score highly. The readers with the shortest attention-spans are in the Bahamas, Peru, Israel and the United Arab Emirates. Perhaps they would rather be spending their time on the beach or climbing Macchu Picchu or something.

The site has readers from 42 American states including a surprisingly high proportion from Texas and Alabama. I didn’t know they could read in these places. But disappointingly, no readers as yet from Mississippi. Come on Mississippi – get your act together!

The top ten most read posts have been:

1. A Review of Mark Steyn’s America Alone
2. Is Gwyneth Paltrow Human?
3. How Can I Get a Promotion in the Office?
4. Burning With a Jealous Rage
5. Is David McWilliams a Demi-God or What?
6. The Mysteries of Female Sexual Psychology
7. Is Ruth Dudley Edwards Falling in Love with Baron Conrad Black of Crossharbour?
8. “Nobody Reads My Blog”
9. Ireland and Debt
10. The Peculiar Sexual Magnetism of Stand-Up comedians

Apparently 703 visitors have only logged on to the site once, never to return again. I like to think that they read the site, discovered happiness, and therefore have no need to come back.

But I’m a bit peeved that more of my profound philosophical posts do not appear in the top ten. It looks like many readers only want gossip and scandal. To hell with you all!

33.31% of readers use Firefox as their browser, versus 48.77% using Internet Explorer. The Microsoft monopoly is not what it once was.

Comic Geeks

Are they art? Dunno, but I read a few of them recently. If anyone has any suggestions of good ones then let me know. Here are the ones I enjoyed:

• Shortcomings – Adrian Tomine. Guy worries about the size of a certain part of his anatomy while trying to find his way amongst bi-sexual Californian slackers. Side-splitting. Really liked it a lot.

• A Contract with God - Will Eisner. Epic tales set in New York. A cut above the rest. All his stuff is brilliant.

• Asterix in Britain, Asterix in Belgium - Goscinny and Uderzo. French classics. Set in the time of Caesar.

• Preacher – Garth Ennis. Violence, cowboys, vampires, crazy plot lines. Total escapism. Great fun altogether.

• Akira - Katsuhiro Ōtomo. Post-apocalyptic Tokyo. Gripping sequential art.

Have also read:

- Palestine – Joe Sacco. Guy from Malta walks around the Palestinian Territories and records what he sees. Heavy going at times, but good.
- Jimmy Corrigan, the Smartest Kid on Earth - Chris Ware. Clever stuff, although I’m still not one hundred percent sure about it.
- It’s a Good Life if You Don’t Weaken – Seth. A beautiful object, but I draw the line at a comic about a guy who is obsessed with collecting comics.
- Watchmen – Alan Moore. Quite clever for a superhero story.
- Sandman – Neil Gaiman. Good stories, but all that fantasy doesn’t really do it for me especially.

Bringing Up Children

A READER WRITES: “As a mother of two young children with lives as busy as my own, I am constantly trying to do more than I can achieve. Sometimes with all of the multitasking, school runs, thank you notes and household responsibilities, not to mention my professional life, I feel like I am doing so many things, none of them as well as I could. My main priority, far and above anything else in my life, is my children, their happiness, stability, individualism and well-being. In your opinion, what are the most effective ways to be with one’s children? What is most important in terms of their emotional and mental development? Are there specific things we can do to help them grow up to reach their full potential?”

BB SAYS: Do the children of working mothers turn out differently to the children of non-working mothers? Answer: according to the studies, on average, there is no difference.

Spend time with your children because you love them. Spend time with them because they are a joy and a blessing. But don’t expect to be able to mould them as you please. Ultimately, their destiny is not in your hands.

According to the best evidence, parenting style has little or no influence on how children turn out. People find this idea outrageous, and even get angry at the mere suggestion of it. We are accustomed to thinking that every little move by a parent is going to have some massive effect on how their children turn out. This is a modern myth, that has unfortunately made parents neurotic and nervous. But Judith Rich Harris and Steven Pinker have provided considerable evidence and arguments, to the effect that how parents rear a child has few or no long-term effects on the child's personality, intelligence, or mental health. Here is what Pinker says:

“Hundreds of studies have measured correlations between the practices of parents and the way their children turn out. For example, parents who talk a lot to their children have kids with better language skills, parents who spank have children who grow up to be violent, parents who are neither too authoritarian or too lenient have children who are well-adjusted, and so on. Most of the parenting expert industry and a lot of government policy turn these correlations into advice to parents, and blame the parents when children don't turn out as they would have liked. But correlation does not imply causation. Parents provide their children with genes as well as an environment, so the fact that talkative parents have kids with good language skills could simply mean that the same genes that make parents talkative make children articulate. Until those studies are replicated with adopted children, who don't get their genes from the people who bring them up, we don't know whether the correlations reflect the effects of parenting, the effects of shared genes, or some mixture. When those studies are done, the results are that the parenting style has little or no influence.

We know that genes matter in the formation of personalities. Probably about half of the variation in personality can be attributed to differences in genes. People then conclude, well the other half must come from the way your parents brought you up: half heredity, half environment, a nice compromise. Right? Wrong. The other 50% of the variation turns out not to be explained by which family you've been brought up in. Concretely, here's what the behavioural geneticists have found. Everyone knows about the identical twins separated at birth that have all of these remarkable similarities: they score similarly on personality tests, they have similar tests in music, similar political opinions, and so on. But the other discovery, which is just as important, though less well appreciated, is that the twins separated at birth are no more different than the twins who are brought up together in the same house with the same parents, the same number of TV sets in the house, same number of books, same number of guns, and so on. Growing up together doesn't make you more similar in intelligence or in personality over the long run. A corroborating finding is that adopted siblings, who grow up in the same house but don't share genes, are not correlated at all. They are no more similar than two people plucked off the street at random. So no, it's not all in the genes, but what isn't in the genes isn't in the family environment either. It can't be explained in terms of the overall personalities or the child-rearing practices of parents.

So what are the non-genetic determinants of personality and intelligence, given that they almost certainly are not the family environment? Many people, still groping for a way to put parents back into the picture, assume that differences among siblings must come from differences in the way parents treat their different children. Forget it. The best studies have shown that when parents treat their kids differently, it's because the kids are different to begin with, just as anyone reacts differently to different people depending on their personalities. Any parent of more than one child knows that children are little people, born with personalities.”

For more details of how these conclusions were arrived at, and on the real factors that determine how children turn out, check out this link:

http://www.edge.org/3rd_culture/harris_children/harris_p2.html

Reader wants less political discussion

A READER WRITES: “I can’t help noticing that your blog has recently been less focused on providing advice to readers about how they can solve their personal problems. There has been less philosophy. Will you be returning to this or will you be sticking to politics?”

BB SAYS: You are quite correct – I have been temporarily distracted by the Furious Attack of the Raging Steynbots. But don’t worry - this site will eventually be able to return to its main purpose – using Philosophical Psychology to try and increase people’s happiness and well-being.

Canadian reader worried about the condition of Europe

A READER WRITES: “You need to take off your social liberal filters and push away the blinders. Demographics aside, this isn’t about Muslim Hordes with Swords overrunning Europe. It is about cultural suicide in the guise of multiculturalism, the infantilizing welfare state, a sense of entitlement without a sense of liberty and self responsibility, and the cultural apathy of those who accept this. It's easy for a vigorous culture like Islam to simply override tired effete institutions in Europe and replace them with another. Open your eyes. Look at what's happening in Europe and in my country, Canada. You'll understand in a few years.”

BB SAYS: You paint a frightening picture of the decline of Europe - its feeble defence of freedom, its sclerotic socialist economies, its low quality of life. Amidst all this despair and anguish, I feel obliged to try and strike a note of hope:

• According to the Economist’s Intelligence Unit’s quality-of-life index, of the top ten countries in the world with the highest quality of life, 9 are in Europe. (The other one is Australia).
  

• According to Reporters Without Borders, of the top 20 countries in the world with the freest press and media, 18 are in Europe (the other two are Canada and New Zealand).

• According to the UN’s Human Development Index, of the top 20 countries in the world with the highest level of human development, 15 are in Europe.

• According to the Economist’s Intelligence Unit’s Democracy Index, of the 20 most democratic countries in the world, 15 are in Europe.

• According to Freedom House, every country in the European Union is classified as “Fully Free”.

• According to the IMF, the World Bank and the CIA, the European Union has the largest and wealthiest economy in the world – it has the highest GDP.

• According to the CIA, the European Union has by far the largest industrial output in the world (i.e. it makes more real stuff than anywhere else). It’s industrial output is 38% higher than that of the US, for example.
  

• According to the UN and the CIA, citizens of the European Union have a higher life-expectancy than citizens of the US.

• According to the UN’s Education Index, 17 of the top 25 best educated populations in the world are in Europe.

• Western Europe is the safest region to live in the world. For example, the murder rate in North America is 440% higher than the murder rate in Western and Central Europe.

• According to the Fortune Global 500, 170 of the largest companies in the world as measured by revenue, are located in the European Union (153 in the US)
  

According to Jared Diamond, the great American scientist writing in the New York Times, “Western Europe’s standard of living is higher than America’s by any reasonable criterion, including life expectancy, health, infant mortality, access to medical care, financial security after retirement, vacation time, quality of public schools and support for the arts”.

One is almost tempted to think that things are not actually that bad in Europe.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quality-of-Life_Index
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_GDP_(nominal)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reporters_Without_Borders
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_Development_Index
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_GDP_sector_composition
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_life_expectancy
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Education_Index
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Satisfaction_with_Life_Index
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Democracy_Index
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murder_rate
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fortune_Global_500

American reader worried about the future of America

A READER WRITES: “Dear Mr. Barrington: I read your article. Every word ( http://brianbarrington.blogspot.com/2009/02/review-of-mark-steyns-america-alone.html ) . The inescapable conclusion is that you are a colossus of ignorance of such monumental proportion as to strain credulity. How does a name-calling idiot like you ever get published? I suppose that's what we have to look forward to for at least another four years because Americans voted for another idiot that thinks America has 57 states and the Speaker of the House thinks "500 million Americans get put out of work every month". The entire Administration is dumber than a bag of rocks, and more venal than illegal drug lords. Why then, should I expect any better from a fool like you? How sad that your admirers respond positively to knee jerk stupidity like yours. How sad you are. Thanks for confirming me in my opinion of leftist jackasses like you. Sincerely, Oodeluph”

BB SAYS: Sorry to hear that you are worried about the future of America. Change can be upsetting, confusing and unsettling for all of us. It can take time to adjust. It can be hard. But I believe that the US is a great nation and that it will survive the threats posed by the current Democratic administration. America has survived other Democratic administrations, including Franklin Roosevelt’s, and he was a communist, as we all know.

I am confident about the future of America for a very simple reason: there are people like you there – people who are ever-alert to the threats to freedom posed by Democrats, liberals, the media, bureaucrats in Washington, the State Department, the elite universities, people who live in US coastal states, Darwinists, feminists, perverts, socialists, the United Nations, Amnesty International, Muslims, Chinese, Russians, Latin Americans (especially Mexicans) and Europeans. By my calculations, over 85% of human beings are a threat to freedom – and that includes a large majority of Americans. So freedom is in peril. There can be no doubt about that. But as long as there are people like you around, people who know what’s going on and who are prepared to take a stand, then there is hope.

Above all the threat to freedom comes from Europeans. Especially the Irish – they pose a much under-rated threat to freedom in my opinion. Did you know that it was the Irish who invented the terrorist warfare that now constitutes the largest threat to freedom in our time? It was the Irish who invented the cowardly guerrilla warfare that precipitated the collapse of the British Empire, which was at the time the greatest force for freedom in the world. Now the British Empire is gone, and the torch of freedom has been passed to Americans like you. I have faith that you will prevail.

Power-Cycling: the future

For many years now, I have been a fan of power-cycling as a means of aerobic exercise. A reader has sent in this podcast, finally vindicating my long-held stance on this issue:

http://podcast.cbc.ca/mp3/quirks_20090131_11519.mp3

Back in my power-cycling days I purchased an exercise bike for precisely this purpose. I would strip off naked, get up on the bike, and pant like a maniac for up to 30 seconds at a time. I repeated the process maybe three times a week. I was roundly ridiculed for this. But it is gratifying to see that health experts now agree that I was right all along. Power-cycling is as good as a 6 hour work-out, according to those who have researched this.

Do I still power-cycle? Unfortunately, my girlfriend moved in with me and I was informed that either the exercise bike had to go, or she would go. After much agonising, and a lengthy weighing up of the pros and the cons of letting her or the bike go, I finally capitulated and got rid of the bike. Do I regret that decision? Only mildly.

Grudging Respect for Mark Steyn

I have to admit that I have a grudging respect for Mark Steyn - he's a hilarious writer, though I totally disagree with him. He is also commited to freedom of speech – so much so that he is even prepared to give some jumped-up, non-entity of an Irish blogger a link from his website. Classy move. On that front at least, I have to hand it to him … even if it has resulted in me receiving a flood of angry posts from his fans.

http://www.steynonline.com/

Ireland and Debt

Some interesting facts:

Ireland’s external debt is $448,032 per person – more than twice as high as that of any other EU country. The next highest is the UK at $189,855 per person. Italy is $124,049 per person. Germany is $54,604 per person. Greece is $3,953 per person.

External Debt is defined as the total public and private debt owed to nonresidents repayable in foreign currency, goods, or services. Basically, it's the amount of money we owe foreigners.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_external_debt

As pointed out in today’s Irish Times, Ireland’s total external debt is greater than that of Japan, Spain or Italy. Ireland’s total external debt is a sixth of the total external debt of the USA. Ireland’s population is currently about 4.5 million, compared to 300 million in the US and 120 million in Japan.

Ireland’s total external debt is 960.86% of GDP or national income – the highest of any country in the world (except Monaco), and by far the highest in the EU. The next highest is the notoriously indebted UK, where external debt is 376.82% of GDP.

One is tempted to ask: should we Irish have been a little less daring and a bit more careful with money?

Should we be careful or daring in life?

A READER WRITES: “These great French writers seem to me be contradicting themselves. Voltaire is quoted as saying “Neither abstinence nor excess ever renders man happy”. This sounds to me like a recommendation for moderation in all things. But then Voltaire goes on to say “They only live who dare”, which sounds to me like recommending the opposite. And then we have La Rochefoucauld saying that “moderation has been called a virtue to limit the ambition of great men, and to console undistinguished people for their want of fortune and their lack of merit”. So he is saying that moderation is for losers. So is moderation a good thing or a bad thing?

BB SAYS: Yes, it does appear that great philosophers sometimes recommend moderation (and even abstinence), but other philosophers equally recommend daring and excess. So there is a contradiction here.

As William Blake once said: “The road to excess leads to the palace of wisdom … for we never know what is enough until we know what is more than enough.” Or Nietzsche: “The secret for harvesting from existence the greatest fruitfulness and the greatest enjoyment is - to live dangerously”.

So should we be cautious, moderate and temperate, like many philosophers recommend, or should we be bold, impetuous and daring, like Blake and Nietzsche recommend?

The philosopher Machiavelli seems to have a nuanced view. In the Prince he says:

“One can see of two cautious men the one attain his end, the other fail; and similarly, two men by different observances are equally successful, the one being cautious, the other impetuous; all this arises from nothing else than whether or not they conform to the circumstances they find themselves in.

To one who governs himself with caution and patience, times and affairs converge in such a way that he meets with success; but if times and affairs change, he is ruined if he does not change his course of action. But a man is not often found sufficiently circumspect to know how to accommodate himself to the change, both because he cannot deviate from what nature inclines him to, and also because, having always prospered by acting in one way, he cannot be persuaded that it is well to leave it; and, therefore, the cautious man, when it is time to turn adventurous, does not know how to do it, hence he is ruined; but had he changed his conduct with the times fortune would not have changed”.

It would follow that the reverse is also true: a naturally adventurous, impetuous person does not know how to change when circumstances require caution, and hence he is ruined - but had he changed his conduct with the times, his fortune would not have changed.

If one needed to draw a conclusion from this contradictory advice I think it would be the following: the best life is a judicious blend of excess and temperance, a kind of Golden Mean between daring and caution. Wisdom consists in knowing when to be moderate and cautious, and when to be adventurous and daring. Two of the cardinal virtues of the Ancient Greeks were moderation and courage. A full life requires both moderation and courage.

However, in the same chapter in the Prince, Machiavelli goes on to recommend the following:

“I hold that it is better to be impetuous than cautious, because fortune is a woman, and it is necessary, if you wish to master her, to conquer her by force; because one sees that she lets herself be won by the bold, rather than by those who proceed coldly. And therefore, like a woman, fortune is always a friend to the young, because they are less cautious, fiercer, and master her with greater audacity”.

Not very politically correct. But I suspect that the reason Machiavelli recommended this is because he knew that people who are excessively adventurous and impetuous are unlikely to sit around reading works of philosophy by people like Machiavelli. Instead, Machiavelli judged that most of his readers are likely to be thoughtful, cautious, moderate types, so he advocated excess and impetuosity for them, in the hope of dragging them towards the illusive Golden Mean – and thus encouraging the excessively cautious to stand up to the excessively impetuous. Good people must sometimes act basely, in order to avoid being controlled and manipulated by baser people. Good people must learn cunning, lest they become the victims of the cunning. That is Machiavelli's message.

One is reminded of Shakespeare's two characters, Hamlet and Macbeth. The former is excessively thoughtful, contemplative and cautious. The latter is excessively impetuous and daring. In both cases, it leads to disaster and tragedy. Some have suggested that the character of Prospero in the Tempest is Shakespeare's example of a character who has attained the Golden Mean between moderation and courage, between thought and action. At the beginning of the Tempest, Prospero is a bit like Hamlet - a good man who devotes himself to contemplation. As a result of this, like Hamlet, he loses his kingdom to a lesser man. But unlike Hamlet, Prospero learns his lesson from this failure - he learns to be cunning, he becomes a contemplative man of action, and thereby restores his position.

The Wisdom of Frogs

In a small attempt to counter the Francophobia that is nowadays so rampant in much of the English-speaking world, this website offers the below list of quotes from great French writers. Hopefully readers will find something useful in them:

• The best way to make your dreams come true is to wake up – Valery

• All which is beautiful and noble is the result of reason and calculation. Inspiration comes of working every day – Baudelaire

• Anything becomes interesting if you look at it long enough – Flaubert

• We don't receive wisdom; we must discover it for ourselves after a journey that no one can take for us or spare us – Proust

• My life has been full of terrible misfortunes, most of which never happened – Montaigne

• Each player must accept the cards life deals him or her: but once they are in hand, he or she alone must decide how to play the cards in order to win the game – Voltaire

• Neither abstinence nor excess ever renders man happy – Voltaire

• We never live; we are always in the expectation of living . They only live who dare – Voltaire

• Our virtues are most frequently but vices in disguise - La Rochefoucauld

• We should not be upset that others hide the truth from us, when we hide it so often from ourselves - La Rochefoucauld

• If we had no faults, we should not take so much pleasure in noting those of others - La Rochefoucauld

• We all have strength enough to endure the misfortunes of others - La Rochefoucauld

• If we judge love by the majority of its results, it resembles hatred more than friendship - La Rochefoucauld

• The truest way to be deceived is to think oneself superior to others - La Rochefoucauld

• Who lives without folly is not so wise as he thinks - La Rochefoucauld

• Moderation has been called a virtue to limit the ambition of great men, and to console undistinguished people for their want of fortune and their lack of merit - La Rochefoucauld

• We hardly find any persons of good sense save those who agree with us - La Rochefoucauld

• Of all things, good sense is the most fairly distributed: everyone thinks he is so well supplied with it that even those who are the hardest to satisfy in every other respect never desire more of it than they already have - Descartes

Do YOU have a problem? Leave an anonymous comment, or send your problem in confidence to brianbarrington@gmail.com

Is Ruth Dudley Edwards falling in love with Baron Conrad Black of Crossharbour?

Apparently lonely women sometimes write letters to prison inmates with whom they then fall in love, and subsequently marry. It seems that renowned Irish columnist Ruth Dudley Edwards has added her name to the list of women who suffer from this unfortunate affliction. She has embarked on a email romance with the jailed Lord Conrad Black, the former newspaper magnate, who was imprisoned for Criminal Fraud. But she hasn’t kept the details of this love affair private. Instead, she has shared every moment of this blossoming romance with the lucky readers of the Sunday Independent.

In a series of bizarre articles in the Sunday Indo, Ruth Dudley Edwards has been publicly cooing about her obsession with Lord Black. She fawns about the “exuberant displays of intellectual prowess” that Black’s emails to her contain. “Prison has not dulled his spirit” sighs the besotted Ruth Dudley Edwards. She slobbers about the “admirable” Black who “quickly set about helping to educate the prison inmates”.

For a while Edwards says she tried to stop thinking about Black and writing columns about him – perhaps in order to stop boring everyone to death. But alas, her plan to forget Black did not work because, confesses Edwards, “I fell to thinking about him again last week”. And low and behold, she wrote yet another simpering column in the Sunday Indo about how great he is, praising Black as “exceptionally loyal”. I presume she is talking about Black’s exceptional loyalty to the shareholders whose money he stole, thus causing him to end up in prison?

In any event, Edwards and her friend Mark Steyn have engaged in a campaign to get Black pardoned by George Bush. Bush thought better of it and rejected the plea to pardon Black – Bush’s first sensible decision after eight years in office.

Before a recent legal appeal against his conviction Black said to Edwards: “I still expect justice to prevail. We soldier on.” The appeal was subsequently thrown out, just like all his other appeals, but that has not stopped Edwards continuing to write in the Sunday Indo about the “misfortunes” and “injustices” that her email paramour has had to endure.

But the battle to clear Conrad Blacks name is not over yet. Oh no! A book is currently being written, Edwards assures us, that will expose “the farrago of outrages that has been inflicted on” Black. The book will “emerge next spring, pulling no punches, and laying this mockery of a [legal] system bare for what it is”. Who is writing this vindication of Conrad Black? Why it’s none other than Baron Conrad Black of Crossharbour himself! When the “book” eventually appears we can expect to enjoy more than one slavering review from the smitten Ruth Dudley Edwards.

What is the source of Ruth Dudley Edwards’ passionate attachment to her jailed beloved? Well, some say it might be due to the fact that he is a Baron, and that Edwards has a weakness for anyone with a title. Edwards had been a long-time hanger-on of someone called Dame Ruth Railton. So Edwards has a history of coming over all starry-eyed in the presence of “aristocrats”. Perhaps that’s what is going on here?

In his mails to Edwards, Black sometimes talks about general political issues of the day. For example, before the recent US election, Black attacked Obama as too “ignorant”, “juvenile” and “hubristic” to be President. “He frightens me” added a trembling Black. “If McCain keeps his wits about him, stays on message, and appears to be alive, he should win” predicted Black, demonstrating yet again his firm grip on reality in another exuberant display of intellectual prowess.

Black has also declared his support for the Irish people who voted No to the Lisbon Treaty. “I was proud of the Irish in the referendum” he announces. Well that will make the people who voted No to Lisbon feel better about themselves.

Is there a Vast Right-wing Conspiracy to Subvert this Blog?

A READER WRITES: “Dear BB, In my rush to read your daily dose of wisdom, I mistakenly typed the following:

http://www.brianbarrnigton.blogpot.com/ - only to find the following:

‘WELCOME to an easy to navigate MEGA-SITE of Bible, Christian, church & religious information, sermons & studies. Includes the audio & written Bible, sound doctrine, prophecy, a photo tour of Israel and spiritual warfare. If it's in the Bible, it should be here. Among the Web's most complete Christian sites, by God's mercy (app. 6000 pgs & 4000 subjects). A few minutes reading this page could PROVE to you the Bible is true.’

Ha! I thought, BB would never put his name to this nonsense! Imagine my surprise then, when I corrected my mistake and found that today, you were discussing the anti-Muslim musings of Mark Steyn.... Coincidence? Surely not!

Do you think the Christian right (or indeed Mark Steyn) has been alerted to the atheist leanings of your blog and in an attempt to brainwash the minds of those who clearly cannot type, have registered a blog domain that will certainly receive traffic intended for yours? (As I am sure that of all your virtual followers, there must be many more like me who are typographically challenged from time to time)

Yours etc, Lil Miss Typo”

Do YOU have a problem? Leave an anonymous comment, or send your problem in confidence to brianbarrington@gmail.com

A Review of Mark Steyn’s America Alone

Mark Steyn’s book America Alone has been a New York Times best-seller, and a number 1 seller in Canada. Steyn is a well-known syndicated columnist. Many people accept the central thesis of this book. Many other best-selling books have made a similar argument, such as While Europe Slept by Bruce Bawer, Londonistan by Melanie Philips, and Eurabia by Bat Ye’or. What is America Alone’s central thesis? Well, the book is called America Alone, but in fact it is mostly about Europe.

According to Steyn “much of what we loosely call the Western world will not survive this century, and much of it will effectively disappear within our lifetimes, including many if not most Western European countries”. In Europe “native populations are ageing and fading and being supplanted remorselessly by a young Muslim demographic. The EU will need to import so many workers from North Africa and the Middle East that it will be well on its way to majority Muslim by 2035”. Europe’s population will before long be “very old or very Muslim”. Either way Western Europe is almost certainly doomed. Europe is in the middle of a “population death-spiral” that has in turn bred "civilizational exhaustion," leaving Europeans unprepared to fight for their ways. "Islam is now the principal supplier of new Europeans and Muslims are profoundly changing Europe. Islam has youth and will, Europe has age and welfare. In 2005 European males aged 20-40 outnumbered Muslim males of a similar age by 18:1. By 2025 this ratio could drop to a mere 2:1”. Europeans are “too enfeebled to resist its remorseless transformation into Eurabia. The average European Muslim has 3.5 children, whereas the average native woman has 1.5. Europe's successor population is already in place and the only question is how bloody the transfer of real estate will be. Europe is dying and America isn't”. Europe, says Steyn, is facing increasing violence from its Muslim population – such as the murder of Theo Van Gogh in the Netherlands by a Muslim extremist. Europe could soon be run by Muslim fundamentalists and Islamicists.

So, that is a summary of Steyn’s argument. Scary stuff eh? No wonder the book has sold hundreds of thousands of copies in the US and Canada, and no wonder so many people are worried. Personally, I’m tempted to flee Europe right now this minute before the Muslim hordes take over the place.

Now, if Muslims are taking over Europe, we might reasonably ask, what proportion of the current population of the European Union is Muslim? Steyn never mentions this figure - a peculiar omission in a book which is about Muslims taking over Europe. So what proportion of Europeans are Muslim? 4%. Yes, that’s it: 4% maximum. 3% according to the CIA factbook. These 4% are going to take over the other 96%, according to Steyn. (The world as a whole, by the way, is about 24% Muslim. So Europe is a relatively Muslim-free corner of the world).

And what about this 4% figure anyway? It includes anyone who can possibly be considered a Muslim: secularised Muslims, moderate Muslims, traditional Muslims – as well as the hordes of swivel-eyed Jihadists galloping over the horizon to conquer Europe any second now. But surveys show time and again that a large majority of European Muslims do not want to live in a Muslim fundamentalist state. This is hardly surprising, since a majority of Muslims in the world also do not want to live in Muslim fundamentalist states – that’s why most Muslim fundamentalist states can only maintain their power by brutally oppressing the local Muslim population. Anyway, how Islamicists intend to establish an oppressive Muslim caliphate in Europe against the opposition of a majority of Europeans and against a majority of European Muslims, has yet to be given a persuasive explanation by Mark Steyn. But that does not stop him predicting it will happen.

If anything, the endangered species in Europe is not the non-Muslim Europeans, but the continent's Muslim immigrants. Muslim Europeans are, on average, poorer than other Europeans, more unemployed, less educated, subjected to discrimination and marginalised from positions of power. Steyn insists that countries such as the Netherlands and France are being submerged under an avalanche of Muslim lawlessness. But Muslims in these countries are relatively peaceful. The murder rate in America is 247% of what it is in France and 383% of what it is in the Netherlands. If you ask me, Americans like Steyn who are worried about violence should be fleeing their dangerous nation to go in live in peaceful countries like France and the Netherlands.

OK, I’m sure Steyn would concede that Europe is only 4% Muslim at the moment. But Steyn insists that Muslim Europeans are having more babies than non-Muslim Europeans. That 4% figure that he never mentions is going to grow, enabling Muslims eventually take over the continent. For example, the average Muslim in France, Steyn tells us, has 3 times as many children as the average non-Muslim French woman. He doesn’t tell us where he got this statistic. The fertility rate in France is 1.98 ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_and_territories_by_fertility_rate ). So the average Muslim woman in France is having well over 5 babies, according to Steyn. Now, most Muslims in France come from Muslim countries in North Africa like Algeria and Tunisia. What are the fertility rates of these countries? Well the fertility rate in Algeria is 1.82. In Tunisia it is 1.73. In both cases, the fertility rate is less than France. Now, unless the fertility rate of Muslims emigrating to France is suddenly shooting up by 300%, it cannot be the case that Muslims in France are having three times as many children as non-Muslim French. “Every Muslim woman in Western Europe is producing 3.5 children” Steyn instructs us. Like Germany for example? Most German Muslims come from Turkey. The fertility rate in Turkey is 2.14.

Question: Are Muslims in Germany suddenly having 3.5 babies each once they move to Germany or is Mark Steyn talking through his hole?

Answer: Mark Steyn is talking through his hole.

Is it the case that Europe is facing "demographic disaster"? The European Union, with its population of 450 million, is one of the most densely populated corners of the world. What about that low fertility rate? Actually, fertility rates are falling everywhere, including in the Muslim world. Steyn warns that fertility rates in Europe are below the replacement rate of 2.1 children per woman. Well, a list of non-European countries where fertility rates are below the replacement rate includes – China, Japan, Australia, Iran, Sri Lanka, Burma, Lebanon, Vietnam, Thailand, South Korea, Taiwan (and also American non-Hispanic whites by the way). All these countries have fertility rates below the replacement level. Almost everywhere else, fertility rates are falling fast – thankfully, given that the world is overpopulated. In general, the more wealthy and urbanised a country is, the lower its fertility rate is. The reason Europe has relatively low fertility rates is because it is wealthy and urbanised. For example, the countries in the world with the lowest fertility rates are Hong Kong and Singapore. Is Steyn worried about their future? If he is then he doesn’t even mention them. He just drones on endlessly about Europe. In any event, demographic predictions are notoriously inaccurate. Basing policies on dubious demographic extrapolations has been a favourite technique of sophists and cranks since at least the time of Malthus. To do so now, at a time when technological developments and increased mobility could alter populations in unforeseeable ways, is particularly feeble.

Final Question: is Mark Steyn a scaremongering fool indulging in Islamophobic fantasies in order to try and scare Europeans into accepting the anti-Muslim neocon foreign policies that he favours?

Answer: yes he is.

The snow is general all over Ireland

“A few light taps upon the pane made him turn to the window. It had begun to snow again. He watched sleepily the flakes, silver and dark, falling obliquely against the lamplight. The time had come for him to set out on his journey westward. Yes, the newspapers were right: snow was general all over Ireland. It was falling on every part of the dark central plain, on the treeless hills, falling softly upon the Bog of Allen and, farther westward, softly falling into the dark mutinous Shannon waves. It was falling, too, upon every part of the lonely churchyard on the hill where Michael Furey lay buried. It lay thickly drifted on the crooked crosses and headstones, on the spears of the little gate, on the barren thorns. His soul swooned slowly as he heard the snow falling faintly through the universe and faintly falling, like the descent of their last end, upon all the living and the dead.”

Is David McWilliams a demi-god or what?

Read this by David McWilliams, the only Irish columnist and commentator who has a clue, apart from Morgan Kelly.

http://www.davidmcwilliams.ie/2009/01/28/a-mortgage-plan-that-will-save-a-whole-generation

Here is Morgan Kelly writing in Aug 2008, before the international financial meltdown:

http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/opinion/2008/0815/1218747921594.html

Facebook Stalkers: what can one do?

A READER WRITES: “Dear Mr Barrington, I do understand that you feel the need for a sabbatical. Indeed, I feel in a somewhat similar situation myself. However, unlike you, it is my sanity that needs to soar to higher plains. You see, I am at odds with what to do with a certain Facebook friend. She is my ex-boyfriend's sister. I have attempted – unsuccessfully to remove her as a friend from Facebook twice. On both occasions, she has somehow lured me back. Just this week, I became her friend again. Don't get me wrong. I really like her, but in order to preserve my sanity in the long run, and to help me get over the break-up more swiftly, what is the correct protocol to use in such a delicate social-networking situation? Sincerely”

BB SAYS: Ah, Facebook. What are we going to do about Facebook? Can anything be done about Facebook? The question is an urgent one - one that surely merits a temporary suspension of my Sabbatical. I know some brave people who have refused to join. “I’m not signing up to that thing!” they insist, a little too forcefully. But one by one they fall. I know other people who have desperately tried to close their Facebook profiles … and failed. Try doing it yourself. You’ll be amazed at how difficult it will be, at how many hurdles will be thrown in your path. You think you can leave any time you want to do you? I have heard of a few dogged souls who have actual managed to close their Facebook profiles. But soon someone inevitably says to them: “Did you see the photos of such-and-such a person’s wedding up on Facebook?”. And inexorably they are pulled back in. Facebook is an unavoidable part of human existence. The common cold, taxes, death … and Facebook.

Given that Facebook is unavoidable, the only question that remains is: how to manage it? How many “friends” should one have, for example? Some people engage in a frantic competition to acquire as many “friends” as possible. If someone they know has more “friends” than they do, they panic, and experience pangs of social rejection. "Why does nobody love me?" they wail. Other people sporadically cull their “friends”. I know one person who recently had such a cull – starting with the people he had never heard of. Personally, I think the optimum number of friends is 66, because that is how many friends I have on Facebook myself.

Now, what to do about your particular problem? Do not be friends with this woman if you do not want to. Get rid of her! Do not explain. Do not apologise. If she comes back with yet another invite then just press the “Ignore” button. She will not receive a message saying “X has brutally rejected your kind offer of friendship”. Instead, she will receive nothing, and be left wondering whether you have actually received the invite, or seen the invite. If she sends the invite again, then ignore it again. Be ruthless. Eventually she will give up. Press the “Ignore” button, baby, PRESS IT NOW! Then you will feel you have regained control of your existence. You will feel elated, and free to get on with the next phase of life’s great adventure.

Reader thinks “unexamined life is well worth living”

A READER WRITES: “You quoted Socrates as saying that ‘the unexamined life is not worth living’. Well I don’t examine my life at all, and personally I feel it is well worth living, thank you very much if you don’t mind all the same.”

BB SAYS: Good for you. But in order to have come to the conclusion that your life is worth living, then surely you must have first examined it in some sense, no?