Why are men unfaithful?

A READER WRITES: “I enjoyed your piece on celebrity scandals. But why are so many successful men so unfaithful to their wives e.g. Tiger Woods, Ashley Cole and John Terry? Should women like me stay away from successful men?”

BB SAYS: “A man is only as faithful as his options” – Chris Rock

To women, it can sometimes feel that they need to make a choice between going out with a boring, mediocre guy who will be faithful to them, or a successful, exciting guy who will be unfaithful to them.

But actually you could say that it is even worse than that - there are no shortage of of boring, mediocre guys who will also be unfaithful to you. It’s just that no one writes about them in magazines. So you might as well go off with a successful one if you get the chance. At least then you might have a few thrills in your life.

However, in reality it is not as bad as all that either. We hear about the successful guys who are unfaithful, but we don’t pay any attention to the many who are faithful and well-behaved. So, although the media can make it appear as though all successful men are unfaithful, it’s not entirely true – it’s just that we focus on those ones, because they are more fun to focus on.

But if you are a good judge of character, and are not taken in by superficialities, then, unless you are unlucky, you will probably end up with a guy who will be faithful to you. On the other hand, if you are an idiot, you will in all likelihood end up with a jerk. People tend to get the partner they deserve. Not always, but generally. As James Joyce once said “Always see a man's weakness in his wife”. The same is true of the fairer sex “Spot a woman’s weakness in her husband”.