Friday, January 23, 2009

“Is Gwyneth Paltrow Human?”


A READER WRITES: "I subscribe to Gwyneth Paltrow's GOOP mails. They really annoy me because she really annoys me, but out of curiosity and the hope that some day she'll seem less like an alien I keep letting them fly into my inbox. Today's one was all these people saying what their favourite books were. She said and I agree that 'The best way to escape (not to mention the least expensive, most hassle-free way) is to curl up by the fire with an amazing, transportive novel.'

She then ruins it all with this gem 'This week I have asked a couple of my best and most literary-minded girlfriends to share their top picks. These are the women who read voraciously and with passion. No TV for them before bed (I need a little something, even 10 minutes of "The X Factor" or a forensic pathology documentary, just something, for Lord's sake!).'

As if aliens really watch x factor. She's all 'I'm human, honest!!'

I don't believe for a second that these are these people's actual favourite books, but rather the books that they hope will lead people to draw the conclusions about them that they want them to. Do you agree?

I am trying to read more, and would like you to recommend a lovely story to me and in return here's my suggestion, it's the last book I read that I loved and was so sad to finish, Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides. I know it's been out ages but I was put off because I thought it was about the place in England. It's not.

In summary – book recommendations please. Thanks. Chris"

BB SAYS: You are quite correct. When people provide lists of their “books of the year” or “what I am reading” it is nearly always an attempt to create an impression about themselves: “Look at all these high-brow books I am reading! Look how intelligent I am!”.

But, as you can see from this site, I repeatedly name-drop heavy-weight intellectuals in order to try and make myself appear more cultured than I actually am. So I am not the person to ask about this. However, I really enjoyed Cormac McCarthy’s “The Road”.

If any other reader has suggestions of good reads, or good stories, nothing too pretentious, for Chris, then please put them in the comments section.

Do YOU have a problem? Leave an anonymous comment, or send your problem in confidence to brianbarrington@gmail.com

9 comments:

  1. Dear Brian,

    I'm a longtime reader first time poster of questions.
    Yesterday I was wandering down Thomas street feeling pretty despondent about the state of the economy and how my coffee was tasting incredibly bitter.
    In truth I think I was loosing faith in the future of the Irish race and in our ability to produce a quality tall-skinny-mocha-frappacino.
    Then I happened to glance down a side street where I saw emblazoned in huge letters "THERE IS HOPE" on the gable end of a building.
    This hit me right in the face. It stopped me dead in my tracks and made me look at the kind of person I was becoming.
    I ditched the coffee, turned my frown into a smile and happily continued on my journey with a spring in my step.

    Later that day I was walking along George's St where I saw a huge neon sign saying "WHY GO BALD?".
    Well I never thought of it before but it seemed to me that there was no reason in the world to go bald - and so seeing this further improved my mood.

    Now do you, as a man of broad classical background, believe that a. There is Hope and b. There is no reason to go bald??

    Also I wonder do you have an opinion on whether a greater intelligence is communicating to us through these signs?
    Once on holiday in Alabama I happened to be urinating and noticed that on the rubber mat for catching cigarette butts it said "Say No to Drugs".
    I've got to tell you that seeing this had a profound effect on me and inspired me to make more responsible choices in future.
    I wonder if I'm particularly suggestible.

    Anyway the best of luck to you,

    Buck Mulligan

    ReplyDelete
  2. I put the above question in the comments section, because there is so much food for thought in it, so many complex issues raised, that I do not feel qualified to respond at the moment. I would need to think about it a lot before I could even attempt a response.

    ReplyDelete
  3. are you writing to yourself now?

    ReplyDelete
  4. I hope not. That would almost be the definition of madness.

    ReplyDelete
  5. It made me laugh out loud - I think this deserves to be posted on its own.
    Maybe had I read this in time I wouldn't have such a receeding hairline

    ReplyDelete
  6. The definition of madness is wearing a top with horizontal stripes while wearing trousers with vertical stripes just like my boss is doing today. She looks like an optical illusion!

    How funny - have a no drugs revelation while peeing!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Well think about it and respond.
    That's what this site is all about right?
    You've put us in the habit of instant gratification - do leave us hanging.

    ReplyDelete
  8. In answer to the question regarding good books I recently read "Oil!" by Upton Sinclair. You may know that this is the book that was the inspiration for the movie "There Will Be Blood!", featuring Daniel Day-Lewis. I havn't seen the movie, however the book is fantastic!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. I have been reading your post,"A Special Message For Obama",and to be honest I have to admit that I am just about sick of this wave of euphoria,that the world seems to have been swept up in,over his election.Everywhere I go I hear people saying how GREAT it is,how INSPIRATIONAL his speeches are and how WONDERFUL it is that America has shown a desire and an ability to make a change!Am I the only one who thinks that this is a load of shite!
    Lest'we forget this is the same America who voted for Bush Jr.,not once but TWICE!After 8yrs of that numbnut who wouldn't vote for change? Should we really be commending them for this? Whilst I have to admit it is refreshing to see not only a Democrat but a black man sitting in the White House after two terms of Republican war-mongering.How much do you really believe will change?Is America really gonna be that different now that the head of the monster is infinitely more likeable?I ask you BB,Will Obama resolve the current economic crisis with a wave of his hand,will he bring an end to hunger,persecution and genocide in Africa in places like Darfur,will he 'liberate' Palestine or rebuke Israel for it's disgraceful and shameful actions over the past few mths.Perhaps he will fart ozone and single-handedly solve the problem of global warming or come down our chimneys at Xmas time and give us all our jobs back!The answer in my opinion is "No!",because here is the thing that the rest of the 'sheep' seem to be missing.Show me a politician who didn't wax eloquent during and before his election into office?(Apart of course from Mr.Bush who couldn't wax eloquent in a candle factory).Show me a politician who didn't promise change and speak of progress,of lowering taxes and raising standards of living,of equality and of a new era of togetherness.I have no doubt that Obama genuinely means every word of what he is saying.As do most politicians but here is the catch and the reason why Democracy has failed us time and time again.Politicians talk the talk and walk the walk this is how they secure votes but once they are in power they all answer to the same paymasters,those same greedy 'capitalist' multinational slave drivers that have been fucking up our world for the last hundred years.And also what do you think is Obama's or any politicians top priority now that he has secured his term in office?Will it be any of the things I have mentioned above?Or any of the other multitude of problems facing the world today?Of course the global recession will be high on his list as jobs keep the masses busy and 'happy' and also it keeps them from asking to many questions,or to put it another way it takes there eye off the ball. And the capitalist slavemasters who are really calling the shots will be eager to have it's materialist debt-ridden minions firmly back in the saddle,so that the whole ridiculous cycle can begin again and they can start making inordinate amounts of money off of our labour weary backs.However let us not fool ourselves into thinking that this will be priority number one.His real priority and that of every other politician on securing election,will unfortunately be re-election when the ballot boxes come calling again.This is the main reason why Democracy has failed us and why it will continue to fail us.Re-election is the reason why politicians continually fail to do what they promise to do.The glorious all-inspiring speeches will continue for a while,then the excuses will start arriving.The PROBLEMS have been inherited from the previous regime,the PROBLEMS are so vast that they can not be fixed over night,the PROBLEMS are so vast that they can not possibly be fixed in one term.They will bamboozle us with facts and figures,graphs and percentages,in order to convince us that some improvements have been made and that show signs of promise for the future.Then it will be time for the glorious speeches again and a second term will be secured on the back of more promises and lyrical persuasion but little in the way of real improvement in the lives of the ordinary people.This is how politics works!So I ask you BB and all people everywhere.Please stop with the Obama lauding and the euphoric monomania as we are as far from real change as we have always been and unfortunately until people start to wake up to whats really going on that's very far!!

    ReplyDelete